Saturday, January 30, 2010

2 Years ago Today

The number 2 seems to be a reoccurring theme in my life when it comes to important things. I tend to have 2 best friends in my life at any given moment, 2 lizards sitting in my room, 2 years left of school, 2 people making up a couple, and 2 very important men in my life. The first, most of you know about. 2 years on a mission for him. The second left on a very different mission 2 years ago.

It was 2 years ago that I lost my best friend.

Tonight, as I did this time last year, I found myself thinking about what was happening the night before my world changed forever. I read the text messages that I couldn't bring myself to delete and are now one of my most precious life lines to my best friend, Skylar Alan Johnson. It was about this time 2 years ago, that I last spoke to him. Tomorrow morning at around 8am is when I got that phone call that was the beginning of the hardest day of my life. A day that I can remember every detail of, even today and that I will remember vividly for the rest of my life. But that's ok, because I need to remember it. I want to remember it.

I think the thing that really hurts me the most is how little I still have of him. I looked through every source I could think of tonight, looking for little bits of him. Pictures, text messages, anything that would help me feel close to him today and realizing that I have so little breaks my heart. Most of the pictures I'll post with this blog came from other sources. If I only would happen January 30th 2008, things would have been very different. I would have treated every minute, every photo like a gift.

Looking back today, I think that's one of the greatest things that Skylar taught me. Even when he was alive, just by being around him, he taught me to live every minute like it was the last you had, and that you would have nothing to loose. He taught me that life is an adventure! That no matter where you're at, there is always something to do (that could usually be filmed so that we could relive those moments as often as we wanted) ;) From Skylar, I learned that buildings aren't just for walking into, but climbing on top of at 3am. This leads to the highlight of my high school career and learning that a romp on the roof of the mall can be the
most terrifying and exhilarating experience ever. Bowling balls actually bounce very well when dropped off of a tall, slopped building. They also clear 17th street. Check surrounding areas for signs of traffic or human activity before doing something that "stretches the law." Shopping carts make very amusing projectiles when propelled by a car. They also make good toilet paper battering rams, hours of fun at the skate park, and perfect make-shift sleds behind a vehicle in the winter time, (Unless your na
me is Adam). The 4 wheel drive on SUV's and trucks was put there to get as much mud as possible on the vehicle. Using the 4 wheel drive is ALWAYS worth it, even if you have to tow your car out of Black's Canyon afterwards. "The Office"and "Brian Reagan" are 2 of the greatest shows on the face of the planet. "That's what she said" jokes can be used in almost ANY situation. If car's were built to reach speeds of 140mph that's just what they should do. Jeeps don't swim well. Mountain Dew is the nectar of the God's. Any activity that usually involves being away from town can be done in the city if you attach the word "Urban" to it. Examples: Sledding, Camping, Sailing, exc. Sneaking out of the house is easier then you'd think it would be. High school dances can be some of the best nights of your life. Dancing like no one is watching is the only way to dance. It's ALWAYS worth it to drive to Wyoming around the 4th of July, but you'll be broke for the rest of the summer. Long drives on the backs of motorcycles are amazing. PA systems are one of the greatest inventions of all time, right next to the wheel, and the printing press. A few large traffic cones make for hours of fun on a weekend. Laughing until your sides hurt can happen on a daily basis. Those phone calls until 3am trying to not wake up your parents are more important then you think. Deep friendships happen when you least expect them. Sometimes your friends choose you, not the other way around. One person can be the glue that holds everyone else around them together. Showing someone how much they mean to you is actions, not words. Stepping out of your comfort zone can change your life for the better. The Plan of Salvation is an incredible comfort to those who have lost someone. You never know how much time you've been given. Be the type of person that touches every life you come in contact with. One person can change my life forever.

Last year, when we all gathered together at Skylar's house, and talked about the memories, about Skylar's life, I realized something. It will always hurt to think about what happened. To realize that those 3am phone calls aren't going to happen anymore, and that everything was different from that day forward. We were all forced to realize that we weren't invincible, and we all grew up faster then we ever expected to. I know I'll cry every year on this day, but that's ok. There are some things in life that we aren't supposed to get over. The thing that is really important is to remember that Skylar lived! Celebrating his life is what today should be about. In his short time in this life, he accomplished something that most people never really realize. He appreciated life for that gift that it is. He touched the lives of everyone around him and I can honestly say one of the greatest blessings that I've ever been given is the opportunity to know him the way that I did. So here's to you Skylar. I'll always be thinking about you and I can't wait for the day when I'll get to see you again.

Take Luck Everyone

Friday, January 29, 2010

I've been doing it Wrong

You know those days that you have when you're doing something, whether it be a math problem or a recipe or anything like that and you realize about half way through that you've been doing it wrong the entire time? That's how I'm feeling a little bit right now.

Not about everything mind you, just a few things in life. Mostly classes. It would definitely help to start going to them a little more consistently, but it's more then that. It's getting excited about them, and taking advantage of what I've been given. I'm so so so SO blessed to be able to go to school and to have parents that love me enough to help me through it. I just need to grab hold of what I've been given and treat it like it deserves to be treated and live it to the fullest and reach as high as I can go. I know I can do better then I've been doing, and it's time to start getting myself there.

It's not just school either.

I've come to the conclusion that I'm a pretty bad friend/sister/daughter. I don't talk to the people I care about the most unless they happen to be in the same apartment or neighborhood as me. This of course is ridiculous and should be remedied ASAP. I'm starting to learn who the people in my life are that really matter but I need to start treating them as such you know? If you are someone I've been neglecting lately I am SO sorry and I promise I'm not purposefully doing it. I'm starting to realize how selfish and "me" focused I've been and how much better I could be doing in this area and its time I really start putting other people before me and seeing what an amazing change that could bring to my life.

The good news is, I am learning and getting better. I've been trying to think about life in a more eternal way and that's what this time in my life is for right? Figuring things out, one step at a time. This is me, committing to be better and to remember the incredible blessings in my life that mostly come in the form of the people that I love the most, even if I don't show it well. You mean more to me then you know and I'm ready to start showing you that.

*On a completely different note,* (because I feel like I need to lighten the mood a little bit) I found my new favorite place to stalk when I'm not creeping around the photolab or out terrorizing the city of Logan. And yes, it might be on the internet, but stay with me for a little bit. If you have the time, check out the guys at Confessions of a Mormon Bachelor Pad. Probably the funniest thing I've read in a LONG while. Brutally honest, up front, and slightly offensive, it's basically my new favorite way to get a laugh when I need one. Read and enjoy!

*Note, I am not responsible for any of you who may be offended by the content of the blog I suggested, but come on, deep down you know what they say is true. ;)

**PS sorry this post is all over the place, but it is 3am and who knows if it will even make sense in the morning. The random ramblings of my brain at this hour I guess!

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

O college...

Funny story today.

So, a little background. Being an art major (almost officially btw) I spend a lot of time in the Fine Arts building which I have been in a love/hate relationship since the first day of art classes. I love it because sitting in there for any amount of time makes me feel like I'm at an art school. Everyone in that building is either carrying some kind of musical instrument, a canvas or camera, or singing at the top of their lungs. It's so artsy and I feel like the incredible talent flowing through the place rubs off on me the more time I spend in there. The hate part comes after spending 14+ hours in the photolab. At that point, you start to forget about the warm, fuzzy feelings you had during the daylight hours and would really rather set the place on fire. After being in this art-school like environment for large parts of the day, at times it's good to remember that I do go to a regular school.

Today's story brutally threw me back into this reality.

So, Rach and I LOVE yoga, and we've been missing it a bit lately. Well, a yoga class opened up that fit into both of our schedules and we were pretty dang excited about it. We got into all of our yoga gear today and headed off to the Hyper building. Well, as we get closer to our class room, we notice a group of big black guys with YOGA mats heading in the same direction. Well, we got a little excited to show off our stuff to these guys, but as we get closer to the room we start to see more and more black guys with Yoga mats. Like not just 4 or 5, we're talking like 12 of these guys. When we finally got to the class room, we glanced inside and realized that the entire football team was taking this class.

We considered the situation...

for about 2 seconds

and decided to head back to the car.

It wasn't worth it to us to get undressed by the entire football team's eyes daily.

But thinking back on it, it probably would have been worth it to go to

Just one class ;)

Thursday, January 21, 2010

On my wish list

So, I have a confession that I am pretty ashamed of. I have never ever, not even for a single day owned a dog.This is no fault of my own. My mom has never been a big dog person. She doesn't like the idea of picking up after them before the kids go running through our yard. But to me, owning a dog is something that everyone who has the means should do. It just seems so American!

That being said, I've been wishing for a dog for myself for a LONG while. But I don't want just any dog. I can't STAND the little yippy dogs that are just begging to be stepped on or drop kicked at any given moment. I'm all about the dogs that are the epitome of the word DOG, and my pick is the perfect example of this. One day I will be the proud owner of one of these little cuties...

A Siberian Husky!

Probably the cutest puppies on the face of the planet in my opinion.

Eventually, these cute little babies grow up into these beautiful DOGS..
Can't you picture hiking in the Tetons, then curling up in front of the fire with one of these gorgeous guys? Needless to say, I'm a little obsessed. Now all I need is a yard... And a house... And money... And a husband that completely agrees with my love of huskies and would be kind enough to surprise me with my new best friend! ;)

Looks like my wish list may be expanding...

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Adventure is out There!

So over the weekend, I took a little jaunt down to Moab to party with my Uncle Neil and my freaking awesome cousins, Jeff and Michelle, and Michelle's son Alan, and when this part of my family gets together there is NEVER a dull moment.

Exhibit A:
Yes, this is me with an ice axe.

I think this quote by Brigham Young sums my family up very well.

We are now gathering the children of Abraham who have come through the loins of Joseph and his sons, more especially through Ephraim, whose children are mixed among all the nations of the earth. The sons of Ephraim are wild and uncultivated, unruly, ungovernable. The spirit in them is turbulent and resolute; they are the Anglo-Saxon race, and they are upon the face of the whole earth, bearing the spirit of rule and dictation, to go forth from conquering to conquer. They search wide creation and scan every nook and corner of this earth to find out what is upon and within it. I see a congregation of them before me today. No hardship will discourage these men; they will penetrate the deepest wilds and overcome almost insurmountable difficulties to develop the treasures of the earth, to further their indomitable spirit for adventure.

Decedents of Ephraim rock

Well, I would describe the trip in detail to you but I think pictures tell the story a little bitter. Needless to say, I was a bit sore after the whole thing, but what could be better then being out in the sunshine and fresh air with the people you love?

Can't wait to see what we do next! :)

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Back to School..

Hey all!

So I've really been digging my first semester as a Jr. here at USU. I've already had some pretty great adventures and it's only Wednesday! I have to say,I love this school and the amazing people I have the privilege to associate with. Check out our moments
of extraordinariness...

So Rach, Jake, and
I are planning an awesome mocktail party. We started the tradition during the summer for Rach's birthday and it has become one of our favorite things to do. We've been experimenting with some recipes as of late and I'm not gonna lie, they're turning
out pretty well! Anyone
who's anyone will be there,
and everyone is invited!

So I'm SO excited for classes this semester. It's pretty much my perfect selection of classes. Here's the line up: 3D design, History of Contemporary Photography, Oceanography, 2 different Institute classes, Guitar, Rock Climbing,and of course, Photography II. Awesome right? Well, with my sweet new photo class comes a new member of my growing family of cameras.

Check out this little cutie...

SOOO excited about taking some pictures with this. It's a 4X5 Crown Graphic View Camera, and he's a bit of antique if you can't tell, but I can't wait to see what he can do!

Also, I found my new favorite winter place here in Logan. It's a little outdoor ice skating rink practically right next to the temple. Corey, Rachael and I decided to try it out and had an AWESOME time! Not too crowded, and only $3! The only problem I had with it was my lack of male companionship... it's a pretty romantic spot,and I struggle with ice skating. It would have been nice to have some arms to fall into instead ofthe ice. ;) Here's some pics of the event if you haven't seen them on Rach's blog already!
As you can see... I was a little uneasy about being on the ice.
Rach was nervous too ;) but check out that view of the temple!

And I biffed it anyway.

I love my friends.

And of course, we have the classics like bowling! Check out the cute girlies I hang with...

It's shaping up to be a good year me thinks...

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Something I've learned as of late...

If there is one thing that I know without a shadow of a doubt, something that has been driven into my head, something that I swear by, my new motto of shorts it's....


That is all

Friday, January 1, 2010

It was a very good year...

So, i woke up this morning with a really good feeling. An unusually good feeling. But for a moment, I knew for a fact that 2010 is gonna be awesome.

I've never had this happen to me on a new years day. Most of the time, I make my resolutions, fail epically at most of them, and the next year sneaks up on me once again. Today was different.

And I'm SO excited about it.

Of course, I've made some resolutions... one of which is blogging more, but I'll discuss those as they come. This post is about looking forward to the future. I think the reason this year is going to be different is because I have SO much to look forward to, yet I have no idea WHAT to expect from it! But because I love lists.. and pictures... this is my tribute to 2010 and all that it could bring...

1. Next week, the start of my Junior year at Utah state, applying for the Art program with an emphasis in photography, taking a rock climbing class, and more adventures with some of my favorite people... most likely involving mustaches of some kind.

2. Palau in May... Pygmy sea horses and lots and lots of jellyfish, and me turning 20 in the middle of it all. Be excited

and of course, 2 more of my favorite people are coming along as well... my fellow chili peppers. Pretty dang hardcore

3. In June, cruise through Northern Europe with this guy...

My family will be coming along too... ;)

4. October 6th. One of my best friends is going to be real again and join us in the good ol U.S. of A!

Making sure he makes it until then should be an adventure in and of itself because of this...

5. November we get to clean almost all of these loons out of office...
Honest Leadership my foot. The republicans aren't much better. It's time to start from scratch.

6. Everything between-Unknown.

Buckle up 2010. Here I come!